I found out I was Dyslexic in primary school, I really struggled with reading, writing, spelling and speech. Still now which you may not believe. I never knew about Dyslexia back then and I never really knew what it meant either. It’s only as I’ve become older and older that I began to wrap my head around the whole thing. I know that spelling and reading aloud are my weaknesses. The spelling can also make pronouncing words difficult for me. I can’t picture words in my head, therefore have nothing to go off when I’m trying to say these words. It’s quite embarrassing really. I often get told that the way I write and the way I talk are completely different. I worry too much about saying big words in case I muck it up, but obviously, with my writing, you don’t hear me say these words. Making it much easier for me to use larger more complex words (I would never say the word complex out without stumbling across it).
My biggest weakness would certainly be speech. I hold back massively, there are 1000’s of words I would never attempt to say and some words I’ve only learnt to say because I’ve practised and practised until I could never possibly say them wrong.
But when it comes to my writing I’ve had a whole mixture of comments. Some people read my work and would never guess I was dyslexic, might not notice a letter out of place, other people make fun and taunt about these ‘simple’ mistakes. I constantly tell my friends close to me to make me aware of the mistakes I make, that there is no other way for me to learn. But indirect tweets about it… just plain childish and so offensive.
In school, many English teachers would tell me I would never achieve that all-important English GCSE that everyone needed. And honestly, I received no help in terms of getting there from any teachers. When I struggled and struggled through module and module no help was given. It isn’t until now that I realise how totally unfair it was. Students who were most likely to be graded an A or B were taught more and more, I assume hoping that these students might even get an A* in their results. Whereas ‘failures’ like myself were just left because they only cared about the ‘high quality’ students.
I remember being told that I would never go on to any form of job that included any type of literature or any kind of public speaking.
I actually went on and passed GCSE English. I got a C in my final exam. All thanks to the determination I had to prove them wrong. Although I couldn’t write well, I loved to write, and still do. I’ve definitely had my wobbles, I tend to ‘umm’ and ‘ahh’ a lot because I’m busy rattling my brain for the right word to say. This is what has always held me back when it comes to Vlogging (which we’ve totally started to do by the way! Here’s our Youtube channel), but I’ve bitten the bullet and started rambling to myself on screen too!
When it comes to blog posts I find myself re-reading them around 5 times before publishing. I then also quickly send links to friends so they can give it a quick read and give me any heads ups on mistakes I’ve made.
But mostly, blogging has helped me carry on learning. Without it I wouldn’t be writing day in day out, I wouldn’t be reading everyone else’s posts. Blogging has without a doubt expanded my knowledge and given me more and more confidence to do what I love to do most!