The Truth About Having a Newborn

January 14, 2019

I’m going to be honest with you, I never really knew what being a mum would entail. I mean I saw women doing it, in the park, in restaurants and in the supermarkets, but what would it really be like, as a 24/7 job. Continuously being a Mother, what would that be like?

Turns out, bloody hard.

Do not get me wrong, I would not rewind time for anything. It’s the best decision I ever made and I would do it a thousand times over. But no one tells you how bloody awful it can be. Especially at the beginning when you’re surrounded by visitors and messages and then suddenly a week passes and no one has muttered a word to you, and you’re just in a fuzzy haze trying to not only keep this baby alive but yourself. You’ve not slept or showered in 8 days, you can smell baby sick wherever you go and you never knew your armpit hair could grow so fast.

I remember walking Theodore around in the pram and breaking down into tears at any given point. Why was I finding it so hard to adjust? What was wrong with me? Every other new mum seemed to be so confident and happy. But now I know that they were probably drowning on this inside just as much as I was.

I was suddenly never alone, I was constantly with this tiny defenceless baby 24/7, yet I felt so lonely. Talking to someone who could never answer me back, talking to someone for the most part couldn’t hear me because they were asleep. It was all so fulfilling but also made me feel so empty.

I just want expectant mums to know that this is all so normal, and partly expected. It makes you feel like the crapest mother alive but as long as your baby is fed, warm and dry you are doing everything that little one expects from you. Remember to give yourself some damn credit once in a while. Still to this day I think I could or should be doing better for Theodore, but truth is I’m doing an amazing job. He’s so happy, he’s learning everyday, he has absolutely every ounce of love from me and for all of that, I’m super proud of myself.

So be proud of yourself. You’re doing a great job, and if you’ve not had your baby yet, you will do a great job. Just tell yourself that on repeat and you’ll soon be walking out the baby-blues one confident Mama.

You’ve got this.

 

 

11 responses to “The Truth About Having a Newborn”

  1. Oh bless you – my heart goes out to you, especially at those lonely times. Having a baby is (slightly ironically) one of the most lonely times, despite never being by yourself, but it is so reassuring to know that others feel that way too 🙂

  2. Sabina Green says:

    You are so right, it is so incredibly hard, no one can prepare you for it. And yes, those feelings are so normal too. I think we all need to give ourselves more credit.

  3. Rachael says:

    Yesss! Being a new mum is so difficult, especially if it is your first child. Everything you go through is completely normal and should definitely be spoken about more so mums know they’re not alone.

  4. Janet says:

    Well said! I went into parenthood blind as well and I wish I had read up more beforehand. Someone said to me “babies are great teachers” and perhaps I believed them, but that is nonsense!

  5. Sonia says:

    Having a newborn was the best part for me, the first six weeks was just sheer bliss. It was hard but I think my hormones just carried me through. After six weeks everything is expected to carry on as normal and the depression hit, nobody popped round to see the newborn anymore and that’s when my postnatal depression kicked in. Oh Boy!!… babies are hardwork!

  6. karen reekie says:

    I was a nanny, then a pediatric nurse, with lots of childcare experience, and it was still a huge shock and adjustment for me. I think it is such a big change and the only job in the world where you don’t get paid, on going training or support from management 😉 It is hard, but rewarding but the books don’t tell you how you will feel about it.
    Thank you for sharing

  7. I remember being totally overwhelmed the day my son was born. He didn’t come with an instruction booklet and I felt like everyone expected me to just know what I was doing, I didn’t. It was tough but I learnt and I coped and we survived.

  8. Newborns are SO hard, especially your first. It is such a shock to the system. With my second I knew what to expect so it wasn’t as difficult, but yes I was constantly beating myself up that I should be coping better!

  9. So true. I clfound it very hard after having my son due to the loneliness. Hubby worked away during the week and there were times I didn’t see another adult from Monday to a Thursday unless I went to the shops. It is both the most rewarding thing you can do, be a parent, but also one of the hardest things to do.

  10. LC says:

    What a fantastic read – I’m expecting my first in a few months time so great to read things like this. Lots of Love LC from luckypretty.blogspot.com

  11. Laura Dove says:

    I love this. Having a newborn is hard work!! After five babies I can relate to this so much, it has got easier with every baby!

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